How to Forgive Yourself and Live in Grace

As human beings we are constantly faced with choices and forks in the road. One of the most challenging things in life is to believe that we are making the best choices. That rear view mirror is always staring us in the face driving us to judge our past and get stuck on what may have been.

If I had only...

Married a better partner

Finished my degree

Got a different degree

Had children

Not had children

Bought a home sooner

Didn't move to that new city

Focused on a different career

Been a better person

Been more mindful of my health

Exercised more

Been a better daughter or son

We agonize over our decisions and beat ourselves up if we think we could have made better choices or done a better job. 

All these decisions are teaching us something....they make us grow and stretch us to become more whole.  

Judgment is one of the most dangerous places to live. Karma laughs when we judge because it is the quickest method to draw the same circumstance into our own life. Judgment is crazy because we are so veiled in this life we are only really seeing about 10% of what’s really happening.

Staying out of judgment allows us to invite joy into our lives. It cultivates patience, loving kindness, and often saves us embarrassment, heart ache and rejection. Judgment of our journey wastes time. If you feel you made a mistake then ask yourself “what is the best move I can make to improve my life now and for the future?”  

Focus on what you want to create in your life rather than looking in the rear view mirror beating yourself up. You will understand the value of the experience down the road. If you could see yourself through the eyes of your soul you would be so grateful. You have done lifetimes of work and you are making great progress.

Be your own cheerleader. You can do this thing called life.  If you can dream it, you can create it in your life. Your life will follow what you focus on.  

Give yourself positive self-conversation. Watch how you speak to yourself and others. When you talk to yourself, your guides are listening. If you only talk about the bad things that’s what they think you want, so turn it around and talk about the good.

Cultivate loving kindness for yourself.  I recently met a lovely young man at one of my events. He was depressed because he was disappointed that he had previously gotten caught up in a lifestyle of drinking and doing drugs. He felt he had wasted years of his life and that if he had gone to university he would be in a much better place. He was planning to enter university but felt he didn’t deserve to be successful because he had been involved in a lifestyle that was destructive. He felt that he was living a lie to move towards success. As we looked at the experience, he realized how much he had grown. He needed to forgive himself and let his past go. He learned he wanted to be successful and that he didn’t want to waste his life. What an amazing gift. I know this guy will be very successful because now he is focused and is going after what he wants.   

In “Journey of Souls', author Michael Newton says when we cross over, we jump into the other persons body and experience all the emotions they experience in our interaction. They do the same and jump into our body and experience all our emotions. We are the only one observing how we did.  We make ourselves proud and move to the next level when we choose grace as we move through challenges with others. When we are unkind, angry, mean, selfish, and negative to others, our soul will create the same situation reversed so our soul can learn and understand the other person’s perspective. If you don’t want to recreate the negative experience, be kind and understanding.

Move though challenges with loving kindness. You don’t always have to agree with each other, just state your truth with loving kindness and without judgement. Fully believe that Spirit has an amazing plan for your soul and that every experience, including the challenging ones, are a course in the University of Life.